Lyrics: The Whomping Willows. Covah Yr Junk.

Hey Justin
-Oh hey Whompy
You're looking a bit sweaty today, what's the dilly?
-I just got back from quidditch practice, it was totally intense
You look like you could use a shower
-Funny you should say that, Whompy, I'm just about to head up to the prefects' bathroom to take a bath. I hear it has the best water pressure in this joint
Oh man...
-What?
Well, you're a hufflepuff, you've heard about what happened to Cedric Diggory every time he took a bath in the prefects' bathroom, right?
-Well, yeah, he unlocked the secret of a magical egg and communicated with mermaids.
Well, yeah, there's that, but there's also moaning myrtle.
-Oh that girl? She's cool. I've played shows with her, she's super nice.
Yeah but, put her in a bath full of naked men and she goes a little crazy.
-I'm sure I can handle it.
Seriously, just make sure you keep your guys in check if you know what i'm saying.
-I don't follow.
Justin, I'll put it bluntly. Cover your junk.

Moaning Myrtle's got a little issue
might be a ghost but she really wants to kiss you
touch you squeeze you make you feel toasty
gotta admit she's a hot little ghostie
wavy brown hair and sweet eyes to match
it's more than enough to make my eggs hatch
but she sweetens the deal with a schoolgirl's skirt
captivating smile and a tendency to flirt
but there's one major problem that I didn't forsee
when I'm washing my trunk she's always looking at me
she wants to take a peek underneath my leaves and see
my main branch if you know what I mean
try to cover up with a handful of bubbles
but the girl is a ghost and she's looking for trouble
can't whomp her away cause my branches swing through her
can't deny that I kinda wanna do her

if you're takin a bath
you better cover your junk
when you're swimmin in the lake you've gotta cover your junk
when you're brushin your teeth you better cover your junk
cause you don't want Myrtle lookin at your junk
when you're takin a bath
you better cover your junk
when you're swimmin in the lake you've gotta cover your junk
when you're brushin your teeth you better cover your junk
cause you don't want Myrtle lookin at your junk

Draco Malfoy droppin this bomb
when I take a bath I put on my thong
when my junk sees Myrtle it hides like a turtle
ducking in it's shell like it's [dunno]

she loves hufflepuffs and gryffindors too slytherins and ravenclaws anyone will do

I didn't realize that my tree hose connected to the system of pipes where human waste is rejected
from the toilets of the noble hogwarts school
and if they left it at that, I would probably be cool
but the catch is this
I've got a little friend who likes to get up in my treehole every now and then
her name's Moaning Myrtle and she's feelin kinda randy
her ghost like features give her the upperhand-y
one minute I be chillin in my birthday suit
cause trees be naked, what's it matter to you?
the next I've got Myrtle feelin up my roots and I'm like
she's a ghost I don't know what to do
I look around to make sure no one's lookin
and no one's around so my branches start cookin
I say "Myrtle, how about we take it nice and easy?
I'm a real nice guy but you make me feel sleazy.

if you're takin a bath
you better cover your junk
when you're swimmin in the lake you've gotta cover your junk
when you're brushin your teeth you better cover your junk
cause you don't want Myrtle lookin at your junk
when you're takin a bath
you better cover your junk
when you're swimmin in the lake you've gotta cover your junk
when you're brushin your teeth you better cover your junk
cause you don't want Myrtle lookin at your junk

hey Justin Finch-Fletchley, fancy seeing you here in the prefect's bathroom!
-AW SHI-