Lyrics: Barry Louis Polisar. Other. Alfabet Song.

A is for armpit, acne and alchemy,
Au naturel and alcohol, albatross and atrophy,
Athlete's foot and anchovy, asthma and autopsy
B is for bombshell, bacteria and me.
B is for bombshell, bacteria and me.

C is for cantankerous, canker sore and candy,
D is for dumbbell, doody balls and dandy,
E is for egghead, enema and ear wax,
F is for follicle, fatty cell and fax.
F is for follicle, fatty cell and fax.

G is for grotesque, gross and glockenspiel
H is for hernia, hemmorhoids (I hope they heal).
I is for imbecile, interface and Illinois
J is for jugular vein, jaundice and joy
J is for jugular vein, jaundice and joy

K is for kickback, karma and killer bee
L is for lint ball, lymph node, and larceny.
M is for mayonnaise, mayhem and misogynist,
N is for nonsense, nudity and nit.
N is for nonsense, nudity and nit.

O is for oatmeal, oreos and oleo,
P is for politics, Pat and Edgar Allen Poe,
Q is for quadruple and R is for rude,
S is for S-hook and T is for two.
S is for S-hook and T is for two.

U is for undulate and V is for villany,
W is too hard and so is X, Y and Z